Self-love and hedonism.

In these tougher times, let's talk about mindfulness a bit and self-physicality and spirituality.

This time, about a more so taboo topic.

Masturbation is a taboo topic, while it shouldn't be, especially during such times we live in right now. Let's talk about its aspects connected to spiritual being.

It can help as an act of self-acceptance, acceptance of your own body through self-love, becoming more aware and grounded. The lower part is our Root chakra, so it can be a process of release of negativity, of negative emotions and feeling of tightness. When we touch ourselves, we become aware of our physical body and we can use it in a tantric way of self-love and acceptance. It is a mindful process of a release of tension.

The other aspect why it is good is because it is sex, but not with someone else - with yourself. Often it is difficult to connect with other being on an emotional level and chaotic sex which is cultivated in our social world brings us more either visible or hidden traumatic experiences - that leaves a shade on our deeper being, on our subconscious level of spiritual growth and cleanliness of our aura. By chaotic sex we don't only affect each other by treating one another as pieces of meat, we also affect the non-visible - the metaphysical being of self - that is our inner shape, the non-visible connection to this world. If there is no emotional connection to another being, that leads to an experience that leaves a void in oneself, that grows bigger in time with how many of acts we have performed this way.

Self-love, however does not harm the other being by making chaotic choices. Human can be an impulsive being, but we have to concentrate on the aspect of social growth and how one can affect another like dominoes and leave the negative veil of aura with the others.

Self-love is also an act of emotional hygiene, which is incredibly important - to recognize not only one's aspect of desire and physical pleasure, but as already mentioned - emotional release and acknowledgement of oneself as a human being connected to biological processes and natural wishes. It's an acknowledgment of sexuality and releasing this side aka balancing it with keeping it non-volatile.

This aspect is important in giving oneself the warmth, receiving the touch - we receive it either from someone else or oneself. It also brings heat to the heart chakra and clears our minds through releasing toxins in our brain - that connects to Crown chakra and a bit to Third eye chakra.

It's an act of self-care both to your body and your mind.

The Grove.

The birds, the runes, the wind, the tunes,

I touch the water, feel the sand in the dunes.

Out of breath I tune in, to feel the air,

I disconnect into the one, outside my lair.

Breath gives me sparkle. It grows the branches.

Sparkle becomes the fire. Ignites the touches.

I grow as a tree, a being, omnipresent.

Of knowledge, I tune out. 

My leaves are my fruit. A Sage. I share my clout.

Time.

Sometimes I just want the time to stop,

Somewhere where it was happy and everything was okay.

I'm sentimental. And I wish we never died in that golden light

I wish the good would forever stay.

I cry. And to empty skies I pray...

That today wouldn't be the lasting day.

The forest red.

 Am I too intense for you?

Too fierce, too much,

Throw of an axe, not a warm touch,

Full blown like a flame, not that of a match,

Am not quiet candle that crackles crisp,

I rather stay silent, but I am a whisp.

Do I break these thoughts that you have?

Of woman who painted is -

Of softness and friendly charm,

And my teeth - they only bring harm,

While foxes run through the woods,

Not appreciated of city's goods.

And I tackle these thoughts in a spin,

Who am I to get up and win.

I lost to all of these rules - you're all set,

Because in the end, I, the forest red,

Am commonly known as only a threat.

Mirror.

Mirror, mirror on the wall,

What's the promise - you might fall.

Broken glass, broken dreams,

Take a thread, bend the seams.

Frightened I doubt I will go with the line,

Certain I thought it will tighten my spine.

Closed off I meant I will open a path,

Let the world break, I'll just do my math.

Out of the breath, I run closer to wall,

Mirror, what's promise? Say, you will fall,

Closed into puzzle, and scatter my parts

Oh, mirror, mirror. A Queen of Hearts.

Bend the dreams. In silence, I throw my darts.

What is freedom?

Walking at the beach, we see the seagulls flying and we think - freedom. With the fresh, slightly salted sea air, we capture that sound as something freeing. Why is that it associates with freedom? Maybe it is about the flapping wings in the air and how they circle in movements that looks so free to us, because it's the plasticity of movements in the air and going to the right side and to the left side in the wind. And then you think - I'd like to be that seagull. But if you were a seagull, you would just rely on your instincts. You'd catch the fish, try not to get killed by other birds, people or humans and basically just rely on your survival instincts. Because you wouldn't be capable to see these things as a seagull that you see while you are human, your brain wouldn't be capable to see the aesthetic aspect of it - the complex beauty and give it that sensational association. For a seagull it's simple.

We, as humans, also can walk in circles on the Earth and go back and forth. So why is it the air that is "freeing"? We also have to survive, but our brains are more complex than that of seagulls, we can get killed, injured any day. There are constant power dynamics. So how is that a freedom?

Even pets - we own them on a leash. They get fed, walked, pet, basically taken care of basic needs, while they are not free - it is like a good cell. With food and care. That is not freedom.

So what is freedom that you mention, when we all rely on basic life mechanisms that affect our bodies which is time and force. Is it just a beautiful sentiment? Because nobody is free. The world is a power structure nobody alive can escape. It is biological, intellectual and spiritual.

And so we watch these birds fly again, flapping their wings, breathing in the fresh, salty air into our lungs, breathing in that sensation of association of a beautiful, fake sentiment - freedom.

We as humans, create these beautiful sentiments that give us a feeling, a fresh breath of life to illustrate, to give it a meaning, even if it is, in reality, non-existant.

You fucking whore.

In this little world of yours,

Mind being fucked, you beg outdoors,

The clear wide space and sweet impression

Of latent whores. Repression.

As you flutter like a butterfly,

Somewhere low, somewhere high -

Throw the bullets in the sky, bitch,

Kiss me hard. I'll bite.

Your words make mind to cum,

Soul wants to fucking die.