The selkie. (It's so much more.)

I am the writer
Of my life
And of all those things,
By eye you can't find.
The grass greener than real,
The sea with a selkie seal,
The castles and rocks,
Without heavy locks.
Skies blue as they could be,
Autumns rich in colours and so beautiful,
As you could see
A trubadour writing a song,
Yet something... completely wrong.
The beauty is there and so is the might,
Yet something is missing so much, I can't fight...

I can't find.

Yet I can feel you at times.
You may not read my messages,
But I wish you came here tonight.

But you know what?
Fuck my morals.
Fuck my mind.
Just tell me, tell me, if I was that blind.
If that all was a joke,
Just tell me,
If I'm out of my mind.
That I saw all those things.
Did I know where this brings?
I didn't. Yet maybe I did.
So instead of staying in my comfort zone,
Instead,
I went for you.
And I'd go again and again.
Even if the whole world would tell me I'm mad.
Because I know that I'm not.
I know what I saw. And I stay by it.
I'm not driven by my fear,
And maybe I'm fucking proud.
And I would say out goddamn loud...
In front of everyone
And humiliate myself -
I would, whatever I could,
To keep you.
Is it really that mad?
That the true love is the one I found
And yet I have to seek you out?
How proud have you been
In your whole goddamn life?
When there is given the truth to you
And you pretend to be
Fucking blind.
Hiding from me,
As if I was the threat,
How high are you in your mind for yourself,
Watching from aside, in the shadows you can surely hide,
While I'm suffering,
Me - you,
When there was another choice,
To reach further for what's true,
What a way to deny what you feel,
When we both each other should heal.
For what's true, for what's real.
No written castles, no seals.
No green grasses, blue skies.
No meadow butterflies.
Yet the divine. Unwritten.
Yet true for only the feeling to see.
The light that was meant there to be.

I stand at the shore.
Silent. With the deepest wish.
Of all those roads... please, help me to find.
The love... isn't the right word, it's so much more.
As a selkie in the starlit sea,
My heart swims to you,

Will yours swim to me?




*selkie - a female shapeshifer into a seal from folklore, not meant here as it's original meaning, but rather meant here as a romanticized concept of willing to shapeshift to be able to cross the sea;